


Fair Fight

by Ladytalon



Category: Firefly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-08
Updated: 2010-06-08
Packaged: 2017-10-10 00:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/93037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ladytalon/pseuds/Ladytalon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Celebrating Unification Day - Serenity style</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fair Fight

  
  
  
  
**Title:** Fair Fight  
**Author:** [](http://ladytalon1.livejournal.com/profile)[**ladytalon1**](http://ladytalon1.livejournal.com/)  
**Characters:** Mal, Jayne, Zoe, Kaylee, OCs  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not making any $$  
**Word Count:** 1,257  
**A/N:** Happy U Day! Belongs to the same 'verse as _More Than Friends_.

  


_   
**Fair Fight**   
_

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Malcolm Reynolds was the sort of man who was always for a fair fight. Trouble was, such a thing was a scarcity these days…but he didn't really mind the lack as long as he was on the correct side of the fight. That sort of advantage was nearly as rare as the elusive 'fair fight', but on a day like today, it didn't really matter.

Force of habit made him find an Alliance-friendly bar to spend every Unification Day in, and he figured that one of these days he would stop looking for this sort of trouble.

One of these days.

He sauntered up to the bar just as some liquored up _hundan_ lifted his glass and roared out a toast to the entire place. "Here's to the Alliance squishin' the Browncoats under their boot heels," the fool yelled before he tossed back his shot and turned to Mal. "Didn't see you drinkin'," he said in a tone that was nearly as ugly as his face. On the other side of the room, a handful of Purplebellies looked over, smelling a fight.

Mal smirked. "That's probably because I don't drink on account of Alliance. Way I see it, the pack of 'em are nothin' but _he chusheng zajiao de zanghuo_." All around the bar he heard the sound of chairs being scraped back as the men present heard the insult, and he decided to up the ante just a bit more. "Seems like all you _niao shi de dugui_ do is celebrate things you ain't in the right of."

"You'd better watch it," one of the soldiers warned, dropping a hand to his sidearm and puffing himself up to his full height like it would impress someone. A group of men lounging by the defective billiard tables glanced over interestedly.

Confidently looking over at the table he'd left, Mal saw Zoë nod at him slightly to signal her readiness and Jayne…. Well, Jayne was too busy dandling Kaylee on his knee to even be aware of what was going on. Zoë nudged the big gunhand and Jayne frowned at the interruption, but sent Kaylee off with an affectionate pat on the rump. His mechanic just rolled her eyes and shook her head at him on her way out the door. "Reckon I'm sick of watchin' anything to do with you _wangbadan de biaozi_."

The soldier lunged at him, and yelped in surprise when he was lifted clean off the floor by Jayne's grip on his weapons harness. "Look at him kick," the merc said thoughtfully. "Looks like some bitty little bug that's been knocked over." Mal grinned; the Purplebelly certainly did look uncommonly like a beetle, what with his helmet crammed over his eyes and the smooth body armor.

"That's enough; put him down and get out or else," one of the beetle's friends threatened with the oldest line in the 'verse.

"Else what?" Jayne asked, giving the soldier he was still danglin' above the floor a good shake like he just couldn't help himself. Knowing Jayne, he probably couldn't.

Mal folded his arms as Zoë came up beside him to favor the rest of the room with one of her no-nonsense glares. "I conjure you're sorely outnumbered… won't be no shame in backin' down and leavin' now while you still can," Serenity's captain said cheerfully.

"I _said_, put him down."

Well, it didn't cost him anything to grant the boy his request. "Jayne? Put the bug down."

Jayne shifted as if in disagreement, dropping his hip slightly. "You got it, Cap'n." The muscles of his right arm swelled and seconds later the 'bug' was flying across the room to wipe out a table with a loud crash.

The rest of the Alliance-loving crowd surged to its feet and closed in on the three crew members. "Who's the one outnumbered now?" the _feifei de piyan_ who'd made the toast grinned, his foul breath wafting towards them and making Zoë wave a hand in front of her face disgustedly.

"I reckon that's still you," Mal said. "You know, most Core hospitals worth their salt can help you out with that breath problem you've got there." He looked around as the crowd drew closer. "Jayne? Your family go to sleep on us or somethin'?"

As the first man laid his hands on Mal's collar, a loud _crack! _ rose over the commotion and the man jumped nearly a foot, yowlin' and hangin' onto his _pigu_. "We was just waitin' for you to make it worth our while," Mattie grinned, drawing back her bullwhip for another try at vulnerable flesh. Kym, Ehren, Dhani, Aden, and Sascha Cobb ranged around their little sister supportively… and the odds of the upcoming fight began to slide over into their favor as the rest of the _liumangs_ realized that the five giants and the tiny one mighty gifted with use of a whip were on the wrong side.

The next few moments, nobody moved until the barman broke the spell by divin' for cover.

Mal ducked a punch and threw his fist into a nearby Purplebelly's side as hard as he could while his Second cold-cocked another with the butt of her Mare's Leg; Jayne was being set upon by three men and tossed one clean over the bar while smackin' the other two with a single blow from a nearby chair. He winced in alarm when Mattie's whip came singin' an inch away from his face; she hooked a bottle of hooch from the bar with the thing and yanked it right into a soldier's face. Aden and Kym trotted past to hurl someone out the door by his arms and legs, then held the swinging doors open for Ehren to toss out a squallin' officer out by the seat of his pants. Dhani and Sascha were each involved in trouncing their attackers, who thought that by gangin' up on the boys they might stand a chance of winning.

Jayne came back to help Zoë dig out one of the soldiers who'd been trying to hide under the bar but had gotten his armor stuck and couldn't move. The big man tucked a bottle of brandy into a jacket pocket and slid a flask of sake down the bar to Mal as soon as his target had been taken care of. "How long you wanna stick around? I seen one of 'em with a radio," Jayne sighed contentedly. "You know? Never much understood your need to make trouble on U Day, but it sure as hell is a lot of fun startin' a fight."

Mal figured they should probably get going – as it was, most of the bar's patrons were lyin' on the floor in piles and groaning. Mattie was still cracking her whip with an inordinate amount of relish and Kym looked up from where he was going through an unconscious soldier's pockets. "We leavin'?" he asked Jayne, who looked at Mal for confirmation.

"That's affirmative – pack it in, Cobbs."

Sascha kicked another man in the ribs as he went past. "Gotcha, Cap'n Mal." Jayne looped an arm around Mattie's shoulders as they stepped through the wreckage they'd made of the bar and went out into the street. Kaylee was perched on a nearby fence and hopped down to greet them, slipping her hand in Jayne's as they moved towards the landing field where Serenity waited.

The first Alliance soldier who'd started the whole thing staggered to his feet. "That's right; you'd better run!"

Mal was thunderstruck. "What did he just say?"

~_fin_~  
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X-posted to [](http://community.livejournal.com/fireflyholidays/profile)[**fireflyholidays**](http://community.livejournal.com/fireflyholidays/) and [](http://community.livejournal.com/ff_fanfic/profile)[**ff_fanfic**](http://community.livejournal.com/ff_fanfic/)


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